Monday, February 07, 2011 @ 8:32 PM
Non stop problems, non stop depressing about some whatever thing. Sometimes I really hate myself, I already have enough thing to worry about and yet I have to spare some thought for others. How many people must I please in life? I'm so tired of all these. I don't even know how long I can live, must I spend my life wasting my time away thinking for you people who had never ever spare a thought for me? I seriously don't know how I spend this 2 months, it seems such a short time but every single day I find my time passing so slow. I can't stop thinking. This helpless and lost feeling is just too overwhelming. At certain point of time I can really feel myself falling so hard and not knowing how to get up. Whenever I remember what you've did, seriously, it's killing me inside out. Sometimes I don't even remember how to breathe, it's just too hard you know? Why must you leave this way? I don't know. I just can't believe you can just come and go like nobody's business. I'm not a water cooler.I've gave my last shot, believing I'll feel much better, knowing which direction to go. I really hope I did not make the wrong decision. Looking at how you act I would say I felt better but I guess I have to really know where I stand.For this someone from the past. I swear I hate the feeling of knowing you're so special. Indeed the past but you happens to really got me. But I believe I would never fall for you anymore because I guess you really make things clear in a hurting yet direct way. I've heard storys about you, I felt disappointed about you but I still believe you're very kind, deep inside.And as for her I don't know how long I can stand you anymore. I'm far to tired to entertain your childish-ness.